From Bemidji, Minnesota to …Venice, Italy

Wow this has been a tremendous whirlwind for me. Five of my eleven portraits have just been accepted for exhibition at the Venice International Art Fair in Venice, Italy.

I am from rural Minnesota and I am a newly emerging textile artist. Less than a year ago I wouldn’t have even called myself an artist. I didn’t have the confidence to own that title. I didn’t claim the right to use the word artist until I received an Individual Artist grant from the Region 2 Arts Council in my home town of Bemidji Minnesota last spring (2019). The grant was used to purchase a new sewing machine because the cheap one I was using kept malfunctioning…and I had a project that I was inspired to work on, a series of portraits of my children made out of fabric and thread. Though that was the beginning for me…the first time I called myself an artist, my process creating began well before that. My children’s participation in a particular Native American ceremony required me to make blankets as a part of their offering. So I had to learn to sew, and being a creative person, I couldn’t just do squares. Instead I created blankets that were very pictorial and each blanket represented an Ojibwe name given to my child at birth. As these blankets were made as a spiritual offering, the process was very spiritual for me. Because it was the only way I could contribute as a non-native woman, I poured everything I had into those offerings. I taught myself this art form and now I cannot seem to let this love affair with fabric go. Even still, though my work is no longer ceremonial, it’s very spiritual for me. An image comes to me first. The images are like visions that nag at me, much like a dream you've had that you can’t stop thinking about. I feel inspiration channeling through me faster than my fingers can move. When the piece is finished, I ask myself “What was this meant to communicate to me?"

As my portraits unfolded and revealed themselves it became clear that my work is an exploration into the role Ojibwe traditional cultural practices and beliefs plays in shaping the way my family sees itself collectively, the role it takes in shaping the personal identities of my husband and my nine children, and the influences or effect it’s had on my own personal identity. As a white woman, the only non-native person in my immediate family, my work is about my reflections as an outsider and about the emotional rollercoaster I often ride as I stand fixed on the outside, but privileged enough to look in. This portrait series is not just about the pieces of Ojibwe culture I’ve been allowed to see, but also what it’s allowed me to see within myself, and even to recognize what cannot be found there.

I then applied to the Watermark Art Center in my home town of Bemidji in Northern Minnesota to show my work as the next step in this journey. I applied November of 2019 with the understanding that if accepted, it generally takes a year to get in there. They accepted my proposal immediately and asked me to exhibit January 10-MArch 28th of 2020. At that point I had only completed half of the eleven portraits I had proposed! Even under those circumstances, I had to say YES!, And so… I worked every spare minute…often sixteen hour days just to get them done. My portraits take a considerable about of time. The least amount of time I spent on one of them was around 200 hours. The small ones take three full days to sew.

From there, my self portrait received International recognition in December 2019. My portrait of my daughter Maddy received National recognition January 1st 2020. My show opened January 10th, 2020. Prior to the date of my opening, the only people who had ever seen my work, …the only people who knew I did this kind of thing, were a few of my close family member and friends, and the very private ceremonial community. February 2020, the portrait of my daughter Luella received International recognition, and the portrait of my son Evan received International recognition. In March 2020 the portrait of my daughter Maddy received recognition again but this time Internationally. I have received all of this national and international recognition without anyone from those organizations ever seeing my work in person.

And now my very first exhibit, in rural northern Minnesota has not even closed yet and my work is scheduled to travel to Venice, Italy for an exhibit for an International Art Fair.

I am so completely overwhelmed by the response to my work. The recognition and accolades have been unbelievable but what has been even more profound and astounding to me is the experience people are having when they engage with my portraits and what people are saying about my work. When I started I thought perhaps people would think that they were pretty or interesting. I did not for the life of me anticipate that anyone would refer to my art as spiritual, medicinal, healing, and haunting. I never in my wildest dreams imagined that people would see what I see or “feel” what I feel when I interact with them. Self proclaimed non-art people are feeling emotions in my work, and I’ve received literally hundreds of beautiful messages and emails from people who need to share with me their experiences and connections with my work, both my community members who’ve seen them in person and strangers from around the world who have not. I had to download a translation app so that I could understand all of the messages sent to me in languages I don’t understand. It’s been a very overwhelming experience for me emotionally and spiritually. I am just so incredibly grateful for the opportunity to have this experience, to have these heart to heart conversations, which is exactly what they feel like to me. When you engage with my work, you see my heart. And when you share with me your experience with my exhibit…I see yours.